The Curious Link Between Procrastination and Anxiety

We all know we delay doing things we are anxious about, like tedious, complex, ambiguous tasks or risky conversations. We start filling up our DO LATER list until an urgent deadline or external pressure clears some items from the backlog, but in parallel, new items get added.  

Only last year, I had the shocking realization that my procrastination was not relieving my stress levels; it was increasing my anxiety instead.  I was getting immediate relief by obsessively scrolling through social media feeds or binge-watching series on Netflix.  But overall, it made me feel guilty and powerless. 

Soruce: Arzopa.com

Three things happened and helped me snap out of this cycle:

1. I got even busier trying to manage work, PhD completion, and parenting

2. I took  Adam Grant's advice on procrastinating productively

3. I read Oliver Burkeman's Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, in which he discusses how to consciously, rather "productively," use the time we have left on earth

   
   

I started prioritizing differently

First, several new prioritization strategies emerged:

1) Focus on reducing cognitive load

I was constantly trying to keep up with information, acquiring, processing, and making countless decisions, often without prior experience in the subject matter. I had so many mental tabs open, and just as many physical ones in my browser. Constantly switching between them left me feeling stressed and confused. Just writing about it now increases my anxiety levels.

Closing these tabs, both mentally and digitally, and focusing on one thing at a time became a crucial self-management skill. Keeping a list of outstanding items on my phone helped me stay organized and keep track of tasks.

2) Manage quality expectations

I am an intermittent perfectionist with a strong internal drive to prove myself to others. Yes, my ego takes over sometimes. People often ask me how I manage to do all this. My answer: Mediocrely.Accepting that I cannot be great at everything and that sometimes "good enough" is enough was key to survival. This applies to everything, even parenting. For the things that truly required excellence, like submitting a client deliverable or finishing my thesis, I had to block adequate time. I negotiated childcare-free time with my husband to focus without distractions.

3) Stop prioritizing only easy stuff and slice bigger tasks into manageable parts

I realized that I often procrastinated on complex tasks and instead checked off easier to-dos just to feel productive. Later, I recognized that this approach only intensified my guilt about the tasks I was avoiding. To break this cycle, I started breaking big tasks into smaller, manageable steps. This allowed me to chip away at them gradually instead of feeling overwhelmed.

4) Reflect on alignment with long-term goals

We have limited time on earth, and sometimes we spend a lot of it on meaningless tasks or relationships. In my case, this involved reading stuff I was not interested in, working on projects with low ROI, or trying to meet Instagram moms' parenting standards. With more experience, I learned more about myself in terms of what makes me happy and started trimming experiences and relationships that brought about negative energies. I am still figuring this one out, but I think I am on the right path.

The Productivity Trap and Procrastinating for Creativity and Productivity

It feels good to use our time more effectively, but Oliver Burkeman warns us about the productivity trap and how people who focus only on accomplishing tasks are never fulfilled because being "productive" frees their time to do even more tasks. It's like being stuck in a hamster wheel.  

By contrast, Adam Grant reminds us that procrastination isn't always about laziness. At times, it can be a productive pause, especially when we are still exploring possibilities or refining our approach to a complex problem.

Much of my work is intellectual, does not have clear outcomes, and does not depend solely on me. This level of uncertainty can be scary sometimes. 

In my transformation process, I discovered several meaningful ways to procrastinate:

1) Movement: A physical activity outdoors to organize my thoughts and recharge my energy. Ex: yoga by the lake, walk in nature.

2) Small gratifications: housework or long-term planning tasks that are boring but have a visible impact, like organizing a messy storage area, sorting through piles of bills, reviewing my investment portfolio, etc. I recently started adding family albums and testing new AI tools to this list.

3) Learning something new: Listening to a podcast or reading a book on an interesting topic, which I normally do not have time to explore. Ex: gut health, geopolitics, history.

4) Creative time: boring (and important) activities can start piling up and lead to stagnation and depression. For me, taking a break and focusing on creative and enjoyable work activities (ex: developing a new project or course) has a similar effect to movement and learning something new.

What about you? Have you developed any interesting prioritization strategies or meaningful ways to procrastinate?